I’m thinking of getting fat

The Witch (Dana Reston)

Edited to add:

Not a great story but full of funny lines and top notch delivery. The cheerleading scenes are the most intriguing as an insight into the literal sidelining of women (I'm with Amy on this one). Buffy under a spell was a cheerful sight: so chipper and thoroughly enjoying singing Macho Man.

"You don't like the color?"

"You were pretending that seeing scantily clad girls in revealing postures was a spiritual experience" "Who said I was pretending?"

"that much quality time with my mom would probably lead to some quality matricide"

"I laugh in the face of danger. Then I hide until it goes away"

"So, mommy dearest is really...Mommie Dearest?"

"That's why you're so cool! You're like a guy! You're my guy friend that knows about girl stuff!" "Oh, great. I'm a guy."

"You are totally, and completely one of the girls!"

"I know that I'll miss the intellectual thrill of spelling out words with my arms" "oo, these grapes are sour!"